Hogwarts, Welcome to the Beach'
by ProfessorJaySnape
Summary: Written before HBP. A fun little 'trip to the beach' fic. The dream team finally graduates and decide to take a go to the beach in Cuba, taking friends and family with them. But, Dumbledore also has the same little getaway planned for his staff for their
1. Tanning with Old Ladies

'Hogwarts, Welcome to the Beach..'

by ProfessorJaySnape

Disclaimer: Everything belongs to Mrs J.K Rowling, the loveliest lady on this planet. I worship her.

Summary: Written before HBP. A fun little 'trip to the beach' fic. The dream team finally graduates and decide to take a go to the beach in Cuba, taking friends and family with them. But, Dumbledore also has the same little getaway planned for his staff for their work in the defeat of the Dark Lord. Mayhem ensues. Mainly HG/SS. Along with other little couples (includes HP/GW, NL/LL). Not very OCC except for the romance/fluff/smut parts, of course. It's natural. -grins-

Enjoy.

Oh, and Much Thanks to my lovely, talented beta, Lena (hdislove) for helping me out with this chapter!

* * *

'The B-ee-ch' Dumbledore sounded it out slowly, his voice dripping with amusement. Severus gaped at him, pretending he hadn't heard it the first time.

'You've got to be joking.' Severus choked, his fellow staff members exchanging humoured looks.

'I'm not going.' Snape said suddenly, and finally. He sat back heavily against the back of his chair, making it creak. Dumbledore smiled and ignored his last comment.

'I've planned a trip for all the staff, its voluntary of course--' Snape looked like Christmas had come early, then Dumbledore beamed at him, 'Except our dear Severus, who needs desperately to get out.' He paused to allow his staff their moment of laughter. Severus sank deeper in his chair and flush with rage.

'A whole month at a beach and camp, no expenses, no students, no Voldemort, Order, or death eaters--and all the eye candy and sun rays you can take. We deserve something after the fight against the Darkness. And victory,' Dumbledore added with a wink, beaming when his staff stirred excitedly, 'Start packing, we're leaving the moment the students step foot the on that train tonight.' Flitwick rubbed his hands together hungrily, 'Just show up in the entrance hall, I've arranged for a portkey from the ministry, it will transport us to a safe muggle free spot by the beach area, where we will then hike to a muggle beach campsite. Thank you, staff meeting over.'

Some professor's lingered behind, whispering excitedly to each other about the trip, helping themselves to refreshments at a table near by, but Snape rose quickly from his seat and rushed out, not wanting to be followed while leaving by Dumbledore, who was watching his back with twinkling eyes.

'Hermmionee! It's your last year, we need to celebrate! Please! It will be so much fun!' Ginny whined. Hermione's friends had be badgering her about joining them on an end of year trip to a beach somewhere in celebration of their graduation from Hogwarts and entrance into adulthood. Mrs Weasley had surprisingly agreed with Ron and Harry's absurd idea, and even bought the tickets for them. But only after they agreed that everything had to be done the muggle way, because they would be staying in muggle areas. Though, Mrs Weasley was a bit uneasy about them not using magic for a month.

'Yeah Hermione, the flight to _Hogan, Cuba_ leaves tonight! Right when we get back to the burrow, come on, we have a whole month of freedom as adult wizards--and witches! Take advantage! No more parents, no more--'

'Studying! And no teachers!' Ron exclaimed excitedly, it finally hit him that there was no more school after Hogwarts. He looked fascinated with the thought. He made Hermione laugh.

Hermione looked around at each of their excited faces and sighed, finally giving in.

'Alright. Who else is going?'

'Ginny, Neville, Ron, Me, You, Luna, somehow she got to come; blame Neville, and with the exception of Percy, Bill and Charlie, all the Weasley kids because it was Mrs. Weasley's money that bought us the trip. Some others might join us too, Dean, Seamus, Lavender and Parvati, I think..' Harry said, ticking off the list on his fingers. He quickly blushed when he mentioned the money, giving Hermione the impression that it wasn't Mrs. Weasley who'd paid at all..

Hermione nodded and headed upstairs to change into her graduation robes, tonight was her last night at Hogwarts and tomorrow it was off to freedom with her best friends. _This summer is going to be great. _She thought confidently, bringing a smile to her face.

Staff gathered in the entrance hall, chatting excitedly, except for one, who leaned sullen in the corner sulking, his cold black eyes narrowed and darted anxiously around at his colleagues.

'Ahh, Severus, nice to see that you showed up. I knew you wanted just as badly to come as everyone else!' Dumbledore exclaimed, his arms wide and welcoming. Snape scowled even deeper.

'Hardly. If I'm not very much mistaken, you're the one that came to my bedchambers earli--er this morning to remind me that I have no choice but to come, I believe your exact words were, _'We can do this the hard way, or the easy way. Choose.' _Yes, those are the words.'

Dumbledore cut him off, completely ignoring his whole argument. He beamed at his staff, his arms wide and warm, 'My dear Severus, you know you want to come! It's alright if you don't want to admit it, I'll play along.' The old man winked in an extremely exaggerated fashion, causing Severus to roll his eyes as his colleagues sniggered.

'Very well, gather around.' Dumbledore walked to the center of the entrance hall and placed a miniature beach ball on the stone floor, 'When I give the signal, place your hand on the ball,' He paused and grinned, 'Someone hold Severus down on it.' Flikwick sniggered but grabbed Snape's wrist and pressed it on the beach ball. Dumbledore mumbled a spell and more then a dozen professors were lifted off their feet, and into the air, where the adventure began.

'I thank you again so much Mrs Wealsey.' Hermione thanked the beaming red headed woman as she checked in all their luggage at the airport. The woman beamed and shook her head.

'Not a problem dear Hermione, you all have fun! And Ronald, if you poke one toe out of line, your in for it!' She hissed at her son who rolled his eyes and groaned.

'Mum, I'm of age and I can take care of myself.' He kissed her goodbye. Neville, Luna, Ginny, The Weasley's, Harry and Hermione walked away and through the gate.

'Plus, I was planning on getting laid in the next 24 hours by some unknown Latin chick, though I don't think I want mum knowing about it.' Ron snorted. Harry laughed out loud and Hermione scowled.

_Two Days Later_

'Your mum is a genius.'

'Well, it was Harry and Ron who actually thought up of it, clever bastards they can be, if they want it bad enough.' Ginny mused with a lazy smirk playing on her lips. She shifted on her towel and turned over, to tan her back. With that she untied the strings from her skimpy bikini to, only throwing it aside. Hermione gaped at her.

'Yeah well, next time they want to travel, I think we need to find a new means of transportation, Ron was looking a green from the plane.' Ginny continued, not noticing Hermione's shocked face. When Hermione didn't respond Ginny scowled.

'Hermione, do you think anyone here cares? Go ahead, try it yourself. We're adults now, well.. you are, I'm just a free spirit.' Ginny laughed with amusement at the flush in Hermione's cheeks at the suggestion of her taking her top off in public.

'No way Ginny, I'm not completely _bonkers_ like you.' She teased, 'Oh alright but just the straps.' She rolled her eyes when Ginny cocked her eyebrow from behind those JLo shades Hermione had bought her as a souvenir from New Jersey when she went with her parents last summer. Hermione laid on her back and untied the strings around her neck and let it fall to the ground past her ribs, just covering her large, difficultly covered breasts.

'Good job. I'm proud of you.' Ginny giggled. The girls tanned for half an hour more before Ron and Harry arrived, to question them what drinks they wanted. Ron gaped at her.

'Hermione...what?'

'Oh Ron, grown up, Hermione's a grown woman.' Ginny rolled her eyes. He looked away, looking like he was about to say, 'YEAH! I NOTICED!' but then turned red. Hermione suddenly felt very self-conscious. She hastily tied the straps back the way they were before and sat up, turning over.

'What did you guys wanna drink?' Harry asked, apparently not bothered with Hermione's show. His eyes were targeting Ginny's chest that pressed against her towel and he licked his lips. Ginny noticed and Hermione spotted a mischievous gleam in her younger friend's eye. Ginny sat up, her arms just covering her nipples as she got up, she licked her lips and winked at Harry. Harry goggled, but Ron elbowed him, eyes widened with disbelief. Hermione snorted and elbowed Ginny.

'Control your hormones.'

Ginny smirked seductively and lay back down, 'A Grasshopper.' Ron nodded and gestured to Hermione to tell him.

She thought for a moment then spoke, 'Passion Mimosa, please.'

Ron nodded and the boys left, Harry in particular had trouble tearing his eyes from Ginny, who was rocking slightly and moaning as she rubbed sun screen lotion on her body. Hermione laughed.

'You never get enough do you? You're such a drama queen..'

'It's a hobby my friend, a hobby.' Ginny said smoothly shaking her red hair out of it's messy pony tail and putting her top back on. Lying back on their backs, the girls waited for their drinks.

'Ron's got a thing for you Hermione..' Ginny pointed out randomly, but Hermione just laughed and rolled her eyes.

'He's always had a thing for me. I even liked him in return in our sixth year, and we even tried dating at the beginning of the seventh year, but it didn't turn out too well. He stopped himself from saying things in fear that I would think they were foolish or stupid.' She sighed then added angrily, 'Did he think that I starting liking him because of his good looks?'

At this, Ginny snorted loudly, covering her mouth as she giggled hysterically.

'You're right. But what do you think about him now?' Ginny asked, after relaxing back onto her towel.

Hermione shrugged and said, 'He's more like a brother now, though I suppose it was always like that. It's kind of like a child in a toy store. They only like it when it's on a shelf, when they get it, it doesn't turn out like they expected. Ron's like that to me. I felt like I was in love with him when I couldn't go out with him and then when I was, it turned out the exact same as before, except not as good. That's when I figured out that I didn't really like him. He's more of a brother then anything, sorry Ginny, I knew you wanted something to happen between me and Ron, but I can't force something to work.'

Ginny smiled and nodded, 'I know, it's just that I thought it would be nice to make you officially part of the family, kind of like a sister. I always wanted a sister.' She added. Hermione's face fell, but then she brightened up.

'Well, if Ron's like my brother, then you like my sister. Besides, I already think of you like a sister, you're the only girl friend that I have!' She said, grinning slightly, poking Ginny in the shoulder. Ginny laughed and poked her back.

She threw her hands up and exclaimed, 'Oh, of course, I know your right! I love you, Hermione!' She laughed, and threw her arms around Hermione. They laughed together, hugging, thinking it was hysterical. Ginny fell on Hermione, making them laugh harder, and then planted a wet one on Hermione's cheek.

In the distance, Harry and Ron could be seen walking towards them in deep conversation with each other, along with four drinks. They laughed about something just as they reached the girls and then nearly dropped the drinks, too busy being shocked and ogling at the girls.

'Uh, girls.. what are you _doing_?'

The two girls just exchanged looks, threw their heads back and laughed.

Severus sipped on a tequila, leaning heavily on the counter of the bar under the small opened hut, spinning slightly on his bar stool. He sighed contently, unbuttoning one more button from his white work shirt, surrendering to the heat. So far, he'd refused to wear anything else, as a punishment to Dumbledore, who wanted him to put on something 'summery', though the truth was, he didn't own any summer clothing, except for some t-shirts, thin tight, long sleeved shirts, or dress shirts. And as for bottoms, only black trousers or black jeans, with the occasional blue jean, though those were tucked down at the bottom of his luggage, in case Dumbledore decided to force them on him.

Now, he wore only his black work trousers and white shirt, well, one of his many identical outfits, and black trainers. He had thrown his very long hair, about collar bone long nowadays, over one shoulder.

He heard joyfully laughter from behind him and he groaned inwardly, keeping his face impassive and stern as his sipped on his drink.

Dumbledore clapped him hard on the back, sitting on the seat next to him, sufficeintly getting everything around him soaking wet.

'The water is fantastic, Severus! You should join us.' He said happily, ordering something for himself as well.

Severus' lip curled bitterly, before he muttered, 'I'd rather _not_, actually. You old people can splash around all you want, but I'm just going to stay here, thank you. Besides, I don't even like the water very much. It's very wet.' He added, before downing the drink and waving his glass in the air, mouthing 'martini' at the bartender. The bartender raised his eyebrows at Dumbledore, chuckling, but accepted the glass.

Dumbledore couldn't help but look a bit disappointed, 'Come now, Severus. All you have been doing for the past two days is drink all day, then the end up drunk at the end of the day, with someone having to hold your hair back while you throw up all night. Don't you tire of that?'

Severus sniggered and started on his third drink of that day, 'Absolutely not. I never got to do that at Hogwarts. It's a nice change.' He said cheekily, watching Dumbledore over the top if his martini. Dumbledore looked into Severus' eyes and shook his head, this time with amusement.

'Alright, Severus. But I promise you that if you don't join us in the water, or on the beach by the end of the week, then the rest of the staff and I will make you go by _force_.' Dumbledore laughed when Severus nearly coughed out his drink.

Severus scowled, putting down his glass with a little _'clink'_, 'I _am_ on the beach, I'm only twenty-five meters away from the old ladies tanning, which, I may add, is as close as I am going. Seeing Minerva McGongall and Pince in bikinis, rubbing lotion all over themselves was not something that I ever wanted to see in this life time and all the ones following, let alone get near.' He raised his glass to his lips in frustration, before lowering the glass and adding, 'What you ask, 'tis alot!' He exclaimed, staring at Dumbledore seriously, who was laughing hysterically.

'No worries, Severus, you'll be tanning with those old ladies by the end of the week.'

* * *

Again, I want to thank my beta, Lena (hdislove) for helping me out with this chapter, you're doinga wonderful job. 

As for you readers, reviews are much appreciated, though if you have something bad to say, just leave, I don't want to put up with your crap. Thanks! But good reviews or constructive crisitsm is always loved : )

Cheers,

Jessi


	2. Carrying Damsels in Distress

'Hogwarts, Welcome to the Beach..'

by ProfessorJaySnape

Disclaimer: Everything belongs to Mrs J.K Rowling, the loveliest lady on this planet. I worship her.

Summary: -see first chapter-

A/N: Oh my gosh. I just realized that after I posted and re-read the first chapter on that the little stars didn't show up. Sorry about that! They were supposed to divide the changing scenes between the students and the teachers.. but it didn't show up on the posted version. –goes to learn to use preview-

Enjoy.

* * *

Night soon came and the members of the graduating class, the Weasley kids, and Ginny were gathered around a fire, like many large groups spread out across the beach. Luna and Neville were in deep discussion as they leaned over a strange looking plant near the water. The Weasley twins were eyeing and making suggestive looks at these two very pretty twin Latin looking girls that sat in the next bonfire beside theirs.

Ron and Harry were quite drunk. They had their arms wrapped around each other's shoulders, singing loudly and horribly off key. Harry hadn't even noticed that his marshmellow had not only burnt, but shriveled so badly that there was not one part that was white anymore and was threatening to fall off it's stick. Ron's marshmellow had skipped the burning part and his had instead just flew off his stick and hit Lavender in the head.

On the log beside theirs, Parvati and Lavender were sitting, trying to get the melted marshmellow out of Lavender's newly braided hair. They occasionally sent Harry and Ron stinky looks when the boys dared reach for another marshmellow.

In the sand, around the fourth log, sat Hermione, Ginny, Seamus and Dean, who were playing a mean game of poker.

Finally, the game neared its end and all four players stared at each other, with their faces impassive, though Ginny couldn't keep a straight face and was starting to giggle from Seamus tickling the bottom on her foot with his marshmellow stick. Dean shook his head but then spoke up seriously, 'Alright guys, the end is near for the poor, unfortunate soul who should happen to get the worst cards. Any dares? Final words perhaps?' He mused, his voice dripping with amusement as he looked around at the other three as if they were being voted off the island.

Seamus spoke up, eyeing Ginny hungrily, 'Alright, the loser strips in front of us all, singing the 'You Better Shape Up' song from the muggle movie _Grease_.' At that, Hermione burst out laughing, nearly revealing her cards.

'Seamus! That's cruel! I don't want to see neither of your…parts! And neither do I want to hear that wretched song!' She giggled, clutching her cards to her chest.

Ginny sighed and said, 'Alright! We agree--'

Hermione jumped up, gripping Ginny's arm in a tight grip, 'We do!' She shrieked, her eyes popping out at Ginny, who just nodded and looked fiercely at the boys.

'We do.' She put down her cards to reveal a full house. The boys kept the face impassive. Seamus smirked and lay down a Royal Flush. Everyone gasped, but Dean grinned and put down four of a kind. Now, everyone was staring at Hermione, who'd felt her throat go dry.

She opened his mouth and squeaked, 'Alright, I'm going.' She got to her feet to go start singing and stripping, as she did so, she threw down her cards. Ginny, Dean and Seamus looked eagerly at the card and burst out laughing.

She had nothing.

---------

The teachers also had their own bonfire on the beach. Minerva, Pince, Pomfrey, and Hooch had their own game of cards on one log, while Hagrid, Vector, and Flitwick played another one on the second log. On the third log, Professor Sinistra sat gazing up at the stars through a miniature telescope and beside her sat Trelawney, though everyone wondered how on earth she agreed this. The absurd woman was meditating, hovering just a few inched off the ground, muttering some foreign rubbish. But the most odd of all of them, was on the fourth log was the Hogwarts headmaster snacking hungrily on a marshmellow, chuckling lightly with deep amusement at his potions master. Snape lay on his back beside Dumbledore moaning and groaning in pain.

'You look a bit green, you know.' Dumbledore said, peering down at Severus with that twinkle in his eye. He waved his marshmellow in little circular motions over his potion master's eyes. Before anything even happened, Dumbledore pulled Snape's hair back, not even having to look to know where it was, for he had done it so many times. Instead, Dumbledore watched the card game from the log beside him, amused by Snape.

Severus moaned as he rolled off the log, kneeling on all fours as he vomited violently on the sand. He panted, wiping sweat from his forehead with the back of his hand. When Dumbledore didn't let go of his hair, and still had the twinkle in his eye, Severus stared at him, until he has forced to all fours, to throw up again.

He finally, though still shaking, crawled weakly onto the log and collapsed onto his back, as he was before. Dumbledore grinned popping another gooey marshmellow into his mouth. Then he looked thoughtful for moment and asked, 'What? Is that the sixth…seventh time this hour?'

Severus moaned and panted out, 'Eighth.' At that, Dumbledore laughed, catching the attention of Pomfrey, who smirked, excused herself for a moment and walked over to Severus, placing her hands on her hips and smirking evilly down at him.

'Had enough?' She asked Severus cheekily, winking at Dumbledore, who grinned and started roasting another marshmellow.

Severus vomited over the edge of the log and came back up, rasping, 'Yes, enough!'

Poppy cackled like the cruel witch she was and laughed at him, 'Well, you're going to have to put up with it until you shrivel!' She joked, but then turned to Dumbledore, still laughing and said, 'I'm feeling merciful tonight. I'm going back to the tents and getting a wet cloths and potion, which should _help _the vomiting.' She waddled away cackling.

Severus growled, that turned into a moan, 'I hate you all.'

Dumbledore laughed then looked up and enjoyed another marshmellow. He looked around the beach and sighed contently, 'Isn't this nice? I'm glad I thought of this, we should do this every year, shouldn't we?'

Severus moaned.

'Yes, I think so too. Ah, look! Some poor girl is having just as much fun as you are. Looks like she lost a bet…though even I am slightly disappointed that she did. She is absolutely _slaughtering_ my favourite Grease song.'

----------

Hermione was red in the face and on the verge of tears when she finally starting putting her clothes back on. The boys had been merciful enough to let her stop when she was about to remove her knickers, though Hermione supposed it was mostly Ginny threatening to cut off their nether regions if they didn't let her stop.

'I hate you all.' She whimpered, putting on her sheer top and bikini top, blinking back tears.

Seamus snorted then shook his finger at her and said, 'Tsk tsk, Hermione _hate _is a very strong word. It should be used with caution.'

Hermione lashed out at him and hissed, 'Seamus, shut up and kindly tell your pants that it's rude to point.' She then stormed off when Seamus blushed and the rest of them started roaring with laughing.

She exhaled angrily and sat down in a huff at the bar, ordering a Bloody Mary, before receiving it a minute later and spinning around rage in her stool, to over look the beach. Now everyone at her bon fire was hysterical with laughter as she could clearly see Ginny retelling the story dramatically, sticking her finger in her bikini, and impersonating Seamus'…reaction to Hermione's little show.

Beside them, was obviously some type of boy scouts trip group, because they were singing camp songs and all were wearing what looked like uniforms of some kind. The adult was strumming away at his guitar and leading the group, though his singing was just as good as Hermione's was.

The ground beside that one, two away from Hermione's own, was interesting. All types of people were in that one, though more old people then anything. There were about four young people there, though one guy was so huge that Hermione feared it might be Harry's uncle, Vernon, but of course this guy was much too large, nearly the size of a tool shack. Something tugged at the back of her mind but Hermione shook it away, still too angry at Dean and Seamus to concentrate on any details.

In the middle of one of the group of old people, was a small person, though Hermione immediately assumed it was a toddler, probably a grandchild or child of one of the older people. Hermione winced at the sight of half-bikini-covered old lady arse as one of bent over to collect their earnings. Thank Merlin though, Hermione was too far to see details!

On the next log, were too odd looking woman, so Hermione didn't even bother. One had huge hair and huge spectacles, though her strange looking stick body made Hermione look away, and blink to get the image out of her head.

On the last log, sat one old man dabbing a cloth over another man's face. The other man seemed attractive from afar, though she could not see for sure. The man laying down leaned over and threw up violently, _that _she could see from the way he trembled so violently afterwards. Hermione winced, feeling bad for the poor ill man.

She spun back to the bar and finished off her drink, pushing the empty glass towards the bartender who smiled at her and took it. She paid and left, feeling much better.

-------------

Finally, it was two hours past midnight before Dumbledore called it a night. Flitwick used his water charm on the fire and everything went dark, except for some small fires that were reduced to little burning ashes all down the beach, where people were retreating to their tents on the campsite.

Severus was walking without assistance, though he was slower then others from exhaustion and cramps from all the vomiting. Dumbledore chuckled and slowed down for him, 'So, what have you learned from tonight?'

Severus exhaled heavily, furrowing his eyebrows in effort then answered, 'I learnt to just stick to seven a day, because today I tried _ten_ martini's and I feel like my brain is about to fall out of my arse.'

Dumbledore scowled, 'No, I was expecting you to say something along the lines of 'I'm never going to drink again' perhaps…No?'

He studied Severus then smiled when Severus looked thoughtful for a moment through his face of pain and exhaustion.

'Albus...' He said, his voice strained.

Dumbledore perked up, 'Yes?'

'Carry me?'

* * *

-giggles- Hehehe! Sneaky? Aren't I? Ha ha, yes I posted TWO chapters in one day. Yeah, I've had 'em written this whole time! -cackles- And yes, I have the third chapter written as well. But I'm going to hold off on that one for a few days, just to torture you!

Much thanks to my lovely beta, Lena (hdislove)! Who also beta'd this chapter. I lovelovelove her:)

Reviews are much loved and so is constructive critism(sp?): )

Cheers,

Jessica Mendes


	3. Poked by the Woody

'Hogwarts, Welcome to the Beach..'

by ProfessorJaySnape

Disclaimer: Everything belongs to Mrs J.K Rowling, the loveliest lady on this planet. I worship her.

Summary: Written before HBP. A fun little 'trip to the beach' fic. The dream team finally graduates and decide to take a go to the beach in Cuba, taking friends and family with them. But, Dumbledore also has the same little getaway planned for his staff for their work in the defeat of the Dark Lord. Mayhem ensues. Mainly HG/SS. Along with other little couples (includes HP/GW, NL/LL). Not very OCC except for the romance/fluff/smut parts, of course. It's natural. grins

Enjoy.

A/N: Sorry for the delay in chapters, lol I honestly completely forgot about posting this chapter lol sorry. but now its up, so read!

* * *

Hermione, Ginny, Lavender, and Parvati lay awake; whispering quietly to each other, for the rest of the camp site was nearly asleep, though there were some random noises of young summer love making itself public once and a while, making the girls giggle.

Hermione looked around and felt odd, as if something was missing something, then she gasped and exclaimed sadly, 'Oh no! Where's Luna! We didn't forget her did we?'

But the other three girls exchange dark grins and Ginny whispered, 'She's sharing the small tent with Neville…they both volunteered, because the three big ones only fit four people. Lucky Fred and George, they get a huge one for themselves!' They giggled at the thought of Luna and Neville alone together in a small tent.

Near four thirty in the morning the girls were just started to get groggy, even Hermione had reached up to turn off the lamp when there was a disruption outside. The girls stared at each other for a moment in fear until they heard who's voice it was.

Hermione clapped her hand over Ginny's mouth when the red head made to explode with laughter.

'OIIIIIIIIIIIIIII! 'Arry!'Arry'Arry'Arry! Look it..LOOK! Sto--STOP 'umping that tree, mate.. Mate..mate! Look it.. I'm going to get LAAAAAAIIID tonigh'! By some hot _foxy _lady! Diddcha see tha' girl that was starring at me the 'ole time we were singing 'Bah Bah Black Sheep', or whateva' the bloody 'ell tha' song goes like..' Ron screamed drunkenly through the entire camp. Even the girls could hear some people laughing from other tents..

'Oi! You're not gettin' _laid_! I am. She was totally turn-id on by my scar! She thou' it was _sexy_! Didn't cha see! Diddcha..diddcha? Potter's gunna make some babies _TONIGHT_, I tell ya'!' He bellowed before laughing like he was the funniest thing.

'You WISH, Potter!' Ron replied, laughing. 'She wus makin' fun of ya' tha 'ole time!' Ron explained, struggling to his feet after a drunken topple over a log.

Hermione could not take it anymore; she unzipped the tent door and peered through the hole, shaking with laughter. Ron and Harry were parading around in their boxers, their arms around each other with bottles of Oldgen's best Fire Whiskey in their hands. They'd apparently lit a fire in the middle of the tents, in which they were dancing around at the present time. Hermione squinted at what they'd used to feed the fire with, and suddenly had a suspicion that they'd used their clothes, because she could just see a large 'R' in the fire in a pool of maroon.

In the background, Hermione could just make out Dean and Seamus shaking with laughter behind the trees, pointing a camera at the two drunken young men. She smirked and put her head back in the tent.

Hermione closed the tent and turned to face the girls. They exchanged pained looks before collapsing with laughter…

---------------

About forty meters away, Severus jerked awake, startling Dumbledore awake too. Severus shot up, his eyes darting around alertly.

'Albus!' He hissed through the darkness.

'Wha? Wuzzit?' Dumbledore groaned from the sleeping bag beside Severus'. The old man put on his glasses and groaned supporting himself with his elbow.

Severus' head turned and jerked all it could, before he looked down at Dumbledore and stared through wide eyes.

'Did you hear that? I could swear I heard Weasley and Potter's voices…Albus I _swear_,' He added, when the Headmaster laughed and removed his glasses, putting them back where they came from.

'Severus go to sleep, you're suffering from a hang over, that's all it is.' The old man whispered, tucking himself in again.

Severus growled and whispered again, jabbing the old man in the ribs, 'I _know _that I'm suffering from a hang over because my head feels like it's about to split in _two_! But Albus, I could swear…I heard them even call each other's _name_s!'

Dumbledore pushed the young man onto his back, 'You're hallucinating because you're going to miss them next year, eh? I bet that's it.' He whispered calmly, before adding, 'Severus, they're all the way back in Britain, there's nearly no chance that they might be in the same country, let alone _city _as us. Now close your eyes and go to _sleep_.' But the old man did not meet Severus' gaze on that, and had that strange twinkle in his eye.

Severus sighed. Albus was probably right, he was just hallucinating..

Severus closed his eyes and tried forget it…

--------------------------

Next morning by ten o'clock, everyone was outside their tents, and of course because they were muggles, they were barbecuing. Booming laughter from the men and uproars of giggles from the wives and ladies were heard from all around, along with the shrieking or laughter of children at play or barking of dogs.

Hermione woke up to the smell of seasoned barbequed ribs coming from right outside her tent and her feet numb from... two boys sleeping on them? Hermione cried out in irritation, kicking the boys hard.

Harry groaned and rolled onto his back, in the process rolling off her feet and onto Ron.

'Oi.. Mum.. don' _sit _on me.. I'm getting' up.. gettin' up..' Ron mumbled, rubbing his eyes and yawning.

Harry, who was laying on his back and on top of Ron, blinked awake and mumbled, 'Oi.. Neville, I think I slept on Trevor again…he's poking me in the arse...'

Ginny and the other girls, who had awoken moments after Hermione, exchanged shocked looks, and then exploded with laughter.

The Weasley twins poked their heads in the tent to see what all the commotion was and instantly burst out in laughter as well.

Grinning madly, Fred pointed a shaking finger at Ron and roared with laughter before bellowing for the rest of the campsite to hear, 'OI! RONNIKINS JUST POKED HARRY WITH HIS WOODY!'

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Severus sat up painfully straight, his ears perking up like a dog's as he heard the unmistakable yell of Fred or George Weasley. All the teachers, whom were all awake and sitting around three picnic tables, with Dumbledore and Flitwick in the background trying to figure out how to work the grill, turned in the direction of the echoing yell.

Severus jerked around in rage and met Dumbledore's gaze. Dumbledore laughed and waved his hand in dismissal, 'Boys will be boys…'

Some teachers made scoffing noises, but Severus was the only one that got to his feet (though swayed a little, for he was still suffering from a hangover) and marched over to Dumbledore, stopping abruptly in front of him.

'I told you! I _told_ you, Albus, they're here! It's not a coincidence that Potter, Weasley and now the terror twins' voices are heard--'

Dumbledore rolled his eyes and turned to face his staff, 'There is not a chance that your students are here. It's ridiculous to think that they could possibly be in the same country, city, let alone the same beach and campsite. Now, we are here to enjoy ourselves, so I want you all to forget about this,' He made to turn away and added, 'Besides, there are hundreds of teenagers on this beach, and all those names are common, so worry not and enjoy yourselves.' He smiled and turned away, ending the discussion. Because the great Dumbledore had said so, all the professors (minus one) seemed convinced and turned back to their discussions, forgetting the whole incident.

Severus was devastated. He sulked back to his seat beside Minerva and grabbed the wet towel that he'd been holding to his forehead and put it back there. Minerva patted his back and said unconvincingly, 'It's alright, Severus. _I _believe you.'

* * *

Hey people, thanks for the reviews! I love them. They make my squishy on the inside.

Oh, but one thing, don't ever review and say something like, 'stop screwing around' then end it with a happy face, because that makes me angry. And I do not do very nice things when I'm angry, like for instance, taking off my story forever. Whoops. Becase you know, I have a life and high school, which I'm having trouble adapting to. So cut me some slack if I don't get my chapters up in time to fit your schedule.

So yep, Read and Review please!

Cheers,

Jessica Mendes


	4. Eaten Bathing Suits

'Hogwarts, Welcome to the Beach..'

by ProfessorJaySnape

Disclaimer: Everything belongs to Mrs J.K Rowling, the loveliest lady on this planet. I worship her.

Warnings: Language, implied sexual mischief, and lightly sprinkled sexual content later on.

Summary: Written before HBP. A fun little 'trip to the beach' fic. The dream team finally graduates and decide to take a go to the beach in Cuba, taking friends and family with them. But, Dumbledore also has the same little getaway planned for his staff for their work in the defeat of the Dark Lord. Mayhem ensues. Mainly HG/SS. Along with other little couples (includes HP/GW, NL/LL).

A/N: This chapter is not BETA'd. My BETA Lena (hdislove) is splashing around at her cottage, bless 'er. She's having more fun then I am, so I'm happy for her! lol ily lena. So, read at your own risk.

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Rethinking the whole drinking thing, Snape decided that perhaps he could use this free time more productively. Though problem was; what to do?

It wasn't like he was going to go out there and tan. Severus Snape did not tan. Nor was Snape going to go swimming, nor 'picnicking', nor play childish games with old people all day. _Watching _old people play childish games was punishment enough. McGonagall's flabby, sagging arse cheeks flapping around was perhaps more painful then Cruciatus. Perhaps.

Almost.

Earlier that day, Severus decided that he'd be merciful, and so pointed out;

'It appears that a part of your bathing suit has fallen off, Minerva.'

Minerva scowled, 'It's all there, Severus.'

'Oh, you are right. But your disgusting arse appears to have swallowed it.'

It gave the rest of the staff quite a laugh to watch Hogwarts' most feared professor running for his life as fast as he could, jumping benches and stumbling over tents to save himself from a raging old lady's wrath.

Snape looked up from the knee he'd been staring at and sighed, looking around the beach. Well, now that he thought about it, watching his colleagues play around wasn't that bad. It was especially amusing watching Flitwick trying to get the Frisbee; he'd run, stumble and then get sat on by some little five year old. It was quite hysterical.

Though, Severus Snape does not laugh. So he smirked instead.

Flitwick, finally fed up of being trampled over, hobbled across the beach and dropped down onto the sidewalk curb beside Snape.

'Bloody little brats!' The little man squeaked, rubbing his severely bruised arm.

Snape snorted and sighed sadly, 'I need a drink.'

Flitwick scowled, but patted Snape's knee, 'I thought you're abstaining for the rest of the trip.'

'Thanks for reminding me.' Snape grumbled... As if he'd _forgotten_. He took a stray lock of hair between his thumb and forefinger and began to twiddling it, fighting off the urge to suddenly start whistling, 'Those little children have taken quite a fancy to you. It's adorable.' Said Snape seriously, watching the tips of the black hair twirl and fall limp between his fingers.

Flitwick mumbled something under his breath and jabbed his little chubby finger in the direction of his little white mustache, 'You'd think they notice the facial hair.'

'Those miniature morons don't notice a thing… That or they think Father Christmas has come to the beach and brought his elves along for the trip. With Albus and Minerva not bothering to hide their disgusting kinkiness, I don't blame them for thinking Mr. and Mrs. Santa Clause are in town. To them, you're the little worker elf.'

Flitwick huffed, 'Oh? And who would you be then? The Grinch?'

Snape waved his hand lazily, 'Oh Filius, don't be ridiculous. I am not green or fuzzy. Nor would I ever dress in a Father Christmas suit; it wouldn't be worth ruining Christmas for… besides the Grinch doesn't live in the North Pole.'

Flitwick rolled his eyes and didn't speak for a minute or so before pointing out, 'You should try and loosen up. You could benefit from it.'

Snape finally turned his head and looked down at the little man, 'I don't think so.'

Flitwick stood, so he was level with the seated Snape, 'Well, you should reconsider it, because you're ruining it for all of us!'

Snape scoffed and spat, 'Ruining it for all of you! You all _dragged _me along, remember? I didn't choose to come. I don't have to feel guilty for ruining anything!'

'Alright, Severus.' Flitwick said sadly and hobbled back to the others, who were starting to light the campfire. Snape looked past the staff and noticed the sun slowly disappearing past the horizon.

'I'm going for a walk!' He said loudly, not particularly caring if anyone heard him or not. Snape shrugged and walked down the beach, as far from the water as the sand would let him.

'Severus is going for a walk.' Madame Pince announced, her tone suggesting that she wasn't very fond of the potion's master.

Dumbledore, who was trying to figure out how to start a fire with two rocks and a pile of twigs, looked up and un-furrowed his eyebrows, 'Wonderful! It'll give him an opportunity to _see the sights_!' He said with a mischievous glint in his eye.

Minerva noticed and narrowed her eyes at him, 'What are you up to, old man?'

Dumbledore shrugged and went back to staring at the rocks, 'Find me a lighter, Minnie?'

McGonagall shrugged but headed off, grumbling under her breath.

'She's right. What _are _you up to, Albus?' Sinistra asked, looking up from her book.

Vector nodded, 'You've been acting oddly... well, odder then normal, Albus.'

Albus looked up, his eyes twinkling, 'Me? Up to something? Absolutely not. I just thought bringing Severus here would relax him. It seems to be working!' He said cheerfully.

Minerva and Poppy exchanged looked then snorted into their drinks, murmuring sarcastically, 'Sure has.'

Kicking sand at small children by 'accident' wasn't as fulfilling as he'd hoped, so now Snape was extra grumpy. Though it was fairly amusing, when that American lady gave him a good telling off for kicking sand in her daughter's eyes, and he pretended not to understand English. Really, he was making up for lost time as a teenager. Black and Potter robbed his fun and thus had loads of it themselves. What were the chances that he was to see any of these people ever again anyway?

With his hands buried in his pockets, Severus walked along the sidewalk that cut through the top of the beach. It gave him a good view of everything that happened as he passed.

Fifteen minutes into his walk, and he was already bored. He'd seen all there was to see. Sand castles, strange beach sports with nets and white quaffles, lots of half naked girls young enough to be his students, old people strolling, he'd lurked through all the stores, and walked in on snogging teenagers... and parents for that matter. What was he supposed to do here for a month? Perhaps he'd catch up on eighteen years of lost sleep. A month was plenty of time, right?

But then again, he couldn't do that. It was like falling asleep in the lion's cage. The nutty old staff members would immediately try to move him into the sun or something. He'd come out looking like a lobster. With a hooked nose.

Like he wasn't terrifying enough.

Hermione absolutely refused to play cards anymore after what happened yesterday. Never again was she ever watching Grease, or letting her wizarding friends watch movies with her anymore.

'You're being ridiculous, Hermione. It's just a game.' Ginny argued, picking up a card and adding it to her hand.

'I refuse, Ginny.' She replied coolly.

Ginny and Seamus snorted.

Harry grinned and said, 'It's _Go Fish, _Hermione.'

Hermione shook her head, 'I don't care. You people corrupt the most innocent things if you can find a way to.. Oh my, what is George doing?'

At that moment, Fred decided to drop down beside them, 'He's going to talk to_ Laina_.'

Ginny rolled her eyes, 'Who?'

Fred's eyes flashed mischievously, 'One of those Latin girls we were talking to yesterday.'

Ginny snorted and pointed out, 'You _winked _at them and flexed your muscles a bit. You didn't talk.'

Fred grinned, 'That's what you _saw._ But after you all left, we stayed back and talked with them. _Extremely _nice girls—'

'—extremely generous, you mean.' Ginny murmured, before nodding over at Dean and adding, 'No, no fives. Go fish.'

Fred draped an arm around Ginny and sighed, 'My dear, _dear_ sister. What I see here is jealousy because your surrounded by beautiful, tanned, _generous_ as you put it, nice _Latin _girls.'

'Or I'm annoyed because you two are being thick. They probably don't even know your names—'

'Ciao, Fred!' One of the girls said as she pasted the group, smiling beautifully and waving at Fred as she strolled away, arm in arm with George away towards the forest. George gave them all thumbs up behind her back and winked at them.

Hermione's jaw dropped and she hissed, 'Where are they going?'

Fred grinned suggestively at Hermione and then turned to Ginny, 'So, what did you saying about them not know our names? Ginny? Dear?'

Ginny looked extremely peeved, but she replied heatedly, 'Well, so what? She knows your name, but where's Miss Latina number two? Probably with her real boyfriend somewhere in the forest, snogging and—'

'She's in the bathroom. What? You thought I came here to _be _with you dolts? _Nah!_ I just wanted you to tell anybody who asks that George and me won't be returning to the camp tonight. We'll be _busy_.' He said cheekily, smiling at Ginny false innocently.

Ginny threw down her cards and glared.

George tapped her on the head and said, 'I'm off. Laraine's coming. See you, kiddies!' He jumped up and strolled over to the twin of the first girl. The girl smiled kindly at everyone and waved. Ginny looked away coldly, while Hermione waved and the other boys gawked.

'She was so... wow.' Harry whispered, and all the boys nodded like robots as they stared after the two pairs of twins. Hermione scowled and Ginny puffed up like a bird.

'I'm going for a walk.' Hermione said suddenly, not wanting to be there when Ginny exploded at the boys.

She ran away and hopped up onto the sidewalk. Almost as soon as her two feet landed on the sidewalk, Ginny's shrieks started up. Hermione winced and quickened her pace. Soon she was far enough that the yells were only faint sounds in the back. She turned around to look back, but figures of running boys from a furious red-head were blurs. She sighed and turned back around, only to run smack into something tall and hard. She fell back on her arse and the person in front of her swayed, falling forward, nearly onto her.

She let out a small yell of surprise, when the figure saved themselves and her by stumbling into a kneeling position.

She gasped and crawled back from underneath them.

'Oh! I'm so sorry. I wasn't watching where I was going! Are you alright?' She asked, standing and helping the man up. He grumbling something as he brushed his knees off.

'Er, pardon?'

The man straightened up and they met eyes. The two jumped back and stared at each other in horror.

'Professor!'

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Oh noes:O

Yeah, okay. I've been lazy. I have no excuse for my crap behaviour. I didn't update in almost seven months. Poo on me. I understand, I am a horrible person.

But, I've posted -yays-! So Review please, because I love reviews. So much, really. They've kept me happy. They make me fuzzy on the inside, for real. I've gotten over the OMGHIGHSCHOOL!fear, and probably will post as soon as I can. I'm at the moment starting on the next chapter, so, don't change the channel kids!

Also, more A/N, I was re-reading thing whole fic and I understand how OOC the characters in the first two chapters are. A little bit more into the third too. So I'll try to keep them more in character through the rest of the fic.

Thanks so much and please REVIEW.


	5. Wiener?

'Hogwarts, Welcome to the Beach..' 

by ProfessorJaySnape

Disclaimer: Everything belongs to Mrs J.K Rowling, the loveliest lady on this planet. I worship her.

Warnings: Language, and implied sexual mischief.

Summary: Written before HBP. A fun little 'trip to the beach' fic. The dream team finally graduates and decide to take a go to the beach in Cuba, taking friends and family with them. But, Dumbledore also has the same little getaway planned for his staff for their work in the defeat of the Dark Lord. Mayhem ensues. Mainly HG/SS. Along with other little couples (includes HP/GW, NL/LL)..

A/N: Special thanks to PolskaDepresja. Your review made me especially happy. Another special thanks to pettybureaucrat who sparked an idea for something that might happen later on. I really love reviews like these. Keep them coming! Also, again, I'd like to add that this chapter is UNBETA'd. My BETA is at her cottage though she will be back at the start of September.

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'_Professor!'_

No. _No. no. no. no_—NO.

Snape turned completely around and strode away. Never in his lifetime did he feel like strangling someone so badly. Not even Voldemort.

Well, perhaps Voldemort, but in this case he was allowed to do it. He was allowed to strangle Albus Dumbledore. Why? Because the old codger would probably just laugh.

But on second thought, then perhaps he shouldn't. No, a hacksaw would do. But where to find a hacksaw on the beach?

From behind him, he could hear Granger following him.

'What do you think you're doing, Miss Granger?'

He turned on her and stood there, glaring at her, his hands balled into fists in his pockets. The bushy haired girl looked taken aback.

'Er... sir, it's shocking to see you here—'

'—I'm no vampire, you know. I'm allowed to get some sun. You can tell your little friends this new piece of information too. I find it quite tiresome walking into my own classroom and smelling garlic—'

Granger almost looked like she was going to laugh, but the little flicker in her eye passed only to be replaced with surprise again, 'No, sir, I meant nothing by it. Only that it's a pleasant surprise.'

Snape looked thoughtful before saying lightly, 'Did you know that _bullshit _can be smelt from miles away?'

Granger looked appalled by his language. That gave him gleeful pleasure. Enough pleasure to take and savor with him on his walk _away _from her.

Again, Granger followed him.

'Sir, I was being sincere. It's a pleasant surprise. Who did you come with?' She asked lightly, though her infamous know-it-all curiosity was almost painfully obvious.

He turned to her again, looking severely irritated, 'That is _absolutely _none of your business. Besides, you're about as overjoyed to see me as I am you. So do me a favor and disappear. You can start by not following me anymore.'

Hermione looked peeved now. She stepped forward and glared right at him. He sneered but didn't step back.

'I bet you came alone, that's what! Because you're ugly and mean and –' But Hermione Granger was one to always be respectful; so she didn't say that.

'Oh,' Was what she really said, 'Well, whoever you came with, I'm sure they're very nice people.'

Snape rolled his eyes, 'You trust too easily.'

Hermione frowned, 'Excuse me?'

'How could you have _any _way of knowing that I came with nice people? I could have come with very horrible people.'

'Sir, you are rambling a bit.'

'I'm aware of that, Miss Granger.'

'Oh.' She said and stopped walking. He didn't stop though. Snape just kept walking relieved that she might finally be _gone_.

He sighed, 'I came with the professors.'

Oh, well, bugger. So much for feeling merciful that day, it only got him into trouble. First it was a raging old woman chasing him through a campsite, and now a clingy half-naked girl who just happened to be an ex-student. A terribly annoying and nosy one too.

Granger caught up with him as he walked and turned around so that she walked backward and could still face him as she spoke, 'Really? Which ones?'

He threw her a filthy look, 'I am _not _listing them off for you.'

Granger blushed but recovered quickly and asked, 'Will you take me to see them?'

He ignored her and said, 'You shouldn't walk like that. You aren't watching where you're going.'

Just as he ignored her, she ignored him and repeated eagerly, 'Will you?'

He looked incredulously at her and snarled, 'Why would I do such a thing? I've just rid myself of you and your absolutely horrid friends and now you expect me to—'

'Oh, please, Professor?'

He snorted, 'That face doesn't work on me.' He rolled his eyes. Behind her, he spotted a small rubbish bin, right in her path too, but she was walking backwards so, most likely was not aware of it. A small smile curled onto his lips; should he tell her, or let her fall on her arse?

He looked back at her and smiled coolly, 'Very well, I'll take you to see them—'

_Five steps… four steps… just three more.._

'—on the condition that you don't tell your friends about it and don't come see us anymore.'

_Three… two steps... should he help her?_

But by the time Snape felt guilty enough to attempt to pull her out of the way, Hermione Granger let out a ear shattering screech and toppled over backwards when the garbage bin hit the backs of her knees. She landed on the sidewalk with a thud. Snape was in shock for about a second before he composed himself and smirked. Coolly, he crossed his arms over his chest and leaned over her, smirking smugly.

'I told you that you shouldn't walk like that.'

Granger sat up, very red in the face as she adjusted her bikini top feverously, 'You should have _told _me that that was there!'

Snape almost wanted to snicker, but he settled for a lazy look, 'Where would the lesson have been in that?'

Granger let out an almost animalistic growl that he would not expect from her and stood, looking furious, 'I think you _owe _me now. Take me to go see the professors!' Whoops, he'd really angered her now.

Snape shook his head and looked disapproving, 'Tsk, tsk, Miss Granger. Tantrums get you no where.'

Then, she looked embarrassed, 'Forgive me, Sir. Would you please take me to see the professors?'

Snape smirked. _Victory_.

He paused to look her up and down in a calculating manner before he sneered, 'Very well, follow me.'

Granger almost seemed like she realized that she was right next to naked in front of her ex-Potions Master. She crossed her arms over her chest and blushed furiously.

'You might want to put some clothes on.' He pointed out snidely, his lip curling as he studied her.

Granger, for a moment, looked a tad ticked, but she nodded, 'Come with me, Sir?'

He raised an eyebrow at her.

'I mean, what if I couldn't find you again?'

He smirked quite evilly and she got the picture.

'Oh! Professor, don't do that. I would honestly like to say hello to the staff, I don't know when I'll be seeing them again. Please don't run off if I ask you to wait here?' She pleaded, looking quite ridiculous now, blushing and begging with her arms crossed across her chest.

He shot both eyebrows up, 'Run off? Tell me, Miss Granger, do I look like I'm five years old?'

The young woman blushed farther and shook her head, 'You're right, sir. Can I trust you to stay here?'

He ground his teeth loudly, causing her to wince, 'Yes. I'll stay here. I'm giving you five minutes. If you're not back in that time, I'm leaving,' He glanced down at his watch and said, 'Go.'

She didn't move. She was staring at him as if saying, 'Are you serious?'

He blinked at her and repeated flatly, 'Go.'

She nodded and ran off. It took him a moment or two to realize that he was staring at her backside as she ran.

_Oh, Merlin… you absolutely corrupt, disgusting old man. You're turning into Albus.._

He shuddered and spun on his heel, looking the other way. Perhaps he was just admiring the design on the back of her little swimming shorts.

But really, he knew he wasn't.

Snape sat down on the edge of the sidewalk, staring at his watch. The two little hands weren't moving. Oh… oh no. Albus must have hoodwinked it or dipped it in water, just to make this 'vacation' more grueling than it already was. That was something cruel that he would do. He was like the Santa Clause version of Voldemort and the Weasley Twins.

Snape groaned and rubbed his forehead with his hand. Two minutes past. He could really just walk away and leave her there. An evil smirk tugged on the corner of his lips. He didn't have to wait for the chit.

No, Snape stood and brushed off his pants. He turned to walk back when the girl came running towards him.

'Back! I— Where were you going?' She asked.

'I was leaving.' He replied.

Her mouth opened a bit; she looked angry and taken aback, 'Leaving? You said five minutes, I only took two!'

He shrugged, 'I'm under no vow with you. I have every right to leave when I got tired of waiting.'

She fixed her t-shirt briskly, then looked up and said, 'Well, let's go, I'm dressed.'

He snorted, and pointed to her bottoms, 'Those shorts are hardly clothes.'

She frowned, 'They're not mine. They're Ginny's. I had to grab whatever I saw.'

He snorted and walked towards her, then past her, back to the teachers bonfire. She followed him and said, 'This is the way back to my camp, you know.'

He scowled, 'Ah, well, we'll make sure no to be seen then.' He looked around and pulled them into the bushes. She started to protest and puff up angrily but then he pulled out his wand and she shut her mouth. Snape tapped the top of her head with his wand and slowly she felt a trickling down her head and all the way down her body. Hermione watched him do the same thing to himself before she felt him take her elbow and lead her back onto the sidewalk.

'Try not to bump into people. You're invisible, remember.'

---

When they reached the part of the beach that the teachers resided on, he removed the spell behind a tree and pushed her out from behind it afterwards.

'Move.'

Hermione frowned, 'Sir, did you know that you're only three bonfires away from ours?'

Snape's eyes widened, 'What!'

She frowned and raised her hand to look out over the crowd of people, 'Yeah, look. You can see all the Weasley's playing cards.'

She was right. In the middle of the crowded beach, there was a large group of bright red-haired people.

Snape groaned, 'This is horrible.'

She shrugged, 'Perhaps not. No one's noticed. They don't really leave that area until dark.'

'This is not making me feel better.'

She shrugged and hopped down from the sideway onto the sand. She fell forwards onto her knees and laughed it off. Snape wasn't laughing, he was staring at her backside in those small jean shorts. He looked away when she stood up and brushed herself off.

'Sorry! I lost my footing.'

'Really. And here I was thinking you just liked to roll around in the sand.' She didn't even wait to listen. Granger took off and approached the bonfire.

'I've brought you all a present.' He said flatly, sitting down on a log and grabbing a bag of crisps. He shook the bag and pulled out a chip, popping it into his mouth.

He didn't expect to choke on a chip. It was too large to go down though. He'd been surprised into swallowing it when the staff erupted in greetings and rushed forward to greet Granger. Snape winced and took a breath, 'Ow.' He murmured, though his little choking episode was missed.

'Miss Granger! Wonderful to see you!'

'What a pleasure!'

''Ermione! What 'er yeh doin' 'ere?'

'She's arrived to make my life hell.' Severus murmured, though McGonagall waved his comment away with a dismissive hand.

'Miss Granger! What an odd coincidence! How are you?'

Granger seemed to love the attention. She stood straighter and beamed at everyone, 'I'm well, thank you! I was just as surprised when I went to take a little walk and I walk into none other than Professor Snape. It was a pleasant little shock.' She said cheerfully, smiling beautifully.

Snape dug around the chip bag, muttering grumpily under his breath.

Flitwick rolled his eyes at him and said to Granger, beaming, 'He didn't give you any trouble, did he?'

'More like she gave _me_ trouble!'

'Ignore him. He's just bitter because we dragged him here.' McGonagall said a tad disapprovingly.

But Granger, being the complete teachers pet and Gryffindor, came to his rescue, 'Oh!' She let out a little laugh and shook her head, 'No, he was very polite, actually.'

Snape snorted to prove her wrong.

She looked a bit uneasy now, but when Dumbledore came up from behind her and called out her name, Snape was off the hook.

'Miss Granger! It's absolutely wonderful to see you!' He said, holding his arms out wide and beaming at his ex-pupil.

Hermione smiled and hugged the headmaster briefly before he invited her to sit down.

'Wiener?'

Miss Granger looked started for a second, looking confused and a tad disturbed. Snape snorted and Flitwick snickered beside him. But when the Headmaster held out a raw hotdog wiener, Miss Granger relaxed and nodded.

'Oh, yes, thank you very much, Headmaster.'

Dumbledore sat back and ignored the amused looks from Snape and Flitwick, who seemed to be the only one who caught Miss Granger's discomfort. Teenagers had the most corrupted minds, and when they weren't snogging each other in the corridors because of it, it was quite amusing.

'So, Miss Granger, tell me, what brings you here?' Professor Sinistra asked politely, smiling mysteriously at the young woman.

'It's our graduation trip, actually.'

Albus' eyes sparkled while Minerva looked ecstatic, 'Really? You should call them over. It'd be nice to see everyone again.'

Hermione smiled, 'Okay!'

Snape dropped the chip bag, causing the crisps to scatter all over the ground.

'WHAT?'

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Yay! Two chapters in one day! This makes me happy.

Next chapter should be up soon.

Read and REVIEW, please!

Thanks!


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